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I'm a Baatezu


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7 replies to this topic

#1 Pencil-Monkey

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Posted 26 January 2009 - 06:40 AM

Sung to the tune of 'I'll be there for you' by the Rembrandts, AKA the Friends theme song. :twisted:

This is about six months old, but it took some time to get it through censorship; even so it hasn't emerged unscathed (see below). I guess you'll just have to sing those bits in the original Infernal, rather than this English translation.

So no-one told you you would need a binding spell,
You wear your fancy robes, then wave your arms and yell,
You thought that I would fulfill your dreams,
But I'd rather eat your soul and listen to your musical screams, 'cause

I'm a Baatezu
All my folks live in Hell,
I'm a Baatezu
Yeah, I even scare myself,
I'm a Baatezu
Summoned by a 9th-level spell

I wonder if you knew a devil pisses lye?
Come here, I'll demonstrate; in the socket of your eye!
Oh, and don't mind all those imps that I just Gated in;
They just brought me stuff I needed, like these tongs and some surgical pins, yeah

I'm a Baatezu
I crush paladins like rats,
I'm a Baatezu
Triple digits in all stats,
I'm a Baatezu
Half the MM2's my brats

[censored]
[censored]
[oh boy, was this ever censored]

I'm a Baatezu
Drinkin' blood like sweet Merlot,
I'm a Baatezu
Demogorgon is my ho,
I'm a Baatezu
I'm the 'in' in Inferno,

I'm a Baatezu
I'm a Baatezu
I'm a Baatezu
I'm the 'in' in Inferno


I can already imagine the sitcom this could be the theme song of: A quirky, kinky show following the zany hijinks of six super-powerful Outsiders trapped in a small Manhattan apartment. They would have hilarious discussions about nothing very much, engage in humiliating acts of sexual depravity, and order out for pizza. Then they would eat the pizza delivery guy.
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#2 Pencil-Monkey

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Posted 16 February 2009 - 06:23 AM

*bump* The show would be called Fiends.

Ba-dum-dum Ksssh!
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#3 DeTheGreat

DeTheGreat

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Posted 16 February 2009 - 11:04 PM

Quite funny. I'm surious as to what the edited bits are. Did you write this yourself?
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#4 Pencil-Monkey

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Posted 18 February 2009 - 03:32 AM

Indeedy-diddly I did![/NedFlanders] And trust me, you're better off not knowing. There are some things Mankind was just not meant to know... :cthulhu:

EDIT: Changed emoticon, because Big C trumps the Devil...
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#5 Hal

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Posted 19 February 2009 - 02:44 PM

That's funny :)

I eagerly await the MP3 file from you Mr Monkey :P

Hal :hal:
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#6 Pencil-Monkey

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Posted 20 February 2009 - 07:11 AM

Ach, crivens! Now I have to get a mp3 recording thingimabob! Thankfully, my atonal warblings will no doubt sound like a passable imitation of an Infernal dialect.
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#7 Pencil-Monkey

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Posted 20 February 2009 - 07:12 AM

EDITED: Double post, Tormdammit. :?
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#8 Hal

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Posted 20 February 2009 - 07:36 AM

You could just plug a mic into your computer and use something like Audacity (which is free) to record it. If you get a backing track and play it through headphones you can sing along to it and then layer to two together :)

Or you can send the resulting files to me and I will do it :D

Hal :hal:
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